Align with Alora

Let's Talk about all things Enneagram + Being a 3, shall we?

March 23, 2020 Season 1 Episode 13
Align with Alora
Let's Talk about all things Enneagram + Being a 3, shall we?
Chapters
Align with Alora
Let's Talk about all things Enneagram + Being a 3, shall we?
Mar 23, 2020 Season 1 Episode 13

So I caved, people have been asking me to repost some of my old episodes and I have to respect good ol' nostalgia. Ok, they're not that old but, if you want them then feel free to binge and take a listen

Today's episode is about the Enneagram and the nine types in detail. And if you want to see the books mentioned they're right here in my Amazon faves ;)

Take the test: HERE

++++


 ****Watch my FREE Masterclass on Showing up on Social + Creating Connection****

Don't Forget to:
Download the free Social Media Connection Guide so you can fill it in and follow along with the class! 

++++

If you loved this episode and want to hear more like it, please subscribe and give us a 5-star rating and if you want to hear more from me send a DM on the 'Gram!! I appreciate your support so much and I can't wait to serve you more this year!

xo, Alora

Show Notes Transcript

So I caved, people have been asking me to repost some of my old episodes and I have to respect good ol' nostalgia. Ok, they're not that old but, if you want them then feel free to binge and take a listen

Today's episode is about the Enneagram and the nine types in detail. And if you want to see the books mentioned they're right here in my Amazon faves ;)

Take the test: HERE

++++


 ****Watch my FREE Masterclass on Showing up on Social + Creating Connection****

Don't Forget to:
Download the free Social Media Connection Guide so you can fill it in and follow along with the class! 

++++

If you loved this episode and want to hear more like it, please subscribe and give us a 5-star rating and if you want to hear more from me send a DM on the 'Gram!! I appreciate your support so much and I can't wait to serve you more this year!

xo, Alora

speaker 0:   0:00
I want to say that I have a problem because I d'oh, I am a people pleaser. And if you haven't followed my older podcast, it was kind of more lifestyle mindset, kind of just positive affirmation based. Well, I've been getting messages and people are like, Can you bring the episodes back or where did these episodes go? And I'm trying to explain like I started a brand new pockets, but because I'm a people pleaser, I think it's okay to kind of post a couple hodgepodge is of old episodes if you really missed them. So I'm gonna be posting my top five favorite old episodes for you guys to listen to. I totally understand if everyone is confused, because most people like change the name a 1,000,000 times, but okay, guys, here's the thing. I change my podcast named like five times, and after a while you just gotta scrap out and start completely new with a different concept. But I will post like I said, a couple of my favorite episodes here that I think will be helpful. Well, it'll basically be five episodes with like a couple of episodes will just be like a hodgepodge mix and match. Um, yeah, Some of the content was good. And instead of, like, re recording them Oh, guys, First of all, I'm just I'm sorry. Mr Throws in here. I said, like, a 1,000,000 times like you get to see my process of podcasting. Growth like this is an example that we all start somewhere. And eventually over time, you do get better. So the whole practice makes perfect thing. It's a real thing just saying, but if you're new here, then this is 100% new to you, but it just sounds like old bad quality. OK, OK, OK, I'll stop rambling and, um, enjoy these next couple episodes. I'm super honored to have you here. I'm honored that you even liked thes old scrappy episodes. And if you don't like them, you can skip, um, some of them we personal. And some of them would just be business. So what are you waiting for? Let's get on into the hodgepodge of the next couple episodes. Hey, guys, I'm a lawyer, Michelle, and you're listening to the align with the Laura podcast. This podcast is about motivation and finding your purpose for all you thriving, create itself there because I strongly believe you don't have to constantly hustle to grow and pursue your wildest dreams. So each week we're gonna be having conversations about things that matter most like motherhood, our faith, photography business and just plain real life. I want to share all the mistakes that I've made because I want you to know that I've been there before and you can totally grow and pursue in your wildest dreams. I'm so glad you're here with me today, friend. Here's today's episode. Okay, So as we're getting closer to April, I think it's about time that I talk about the topic that the workshop will be dealing with. We're gonna be talking about marketing and branding yourself effectively as a photographer, as a wedding photographer, as a creative entrepreneur, as a business, these practices have actually worked for all different types of industries. I have men toward different types of industries and its has given people results. Um, so if you want to sign up to be on the weightless guys, you ready for that branding makeover? You need to just skyrocket yourself into the business. Then this is the workshop for you. Basically everything that I'm going to be teaching you is the step by step system that I implemented to market my business to where it is now. So I'm telling you, it really does work. I'm not blowing hot air. We're going to be having tangible takeaways. We're gonna be having worksheets. It's gonna be great. It's gonna be like school. But, like, fun, like I'm a cool teacher, I feel. Anyway, um, if you want to join the workshop, police done it for the weightless. And I cannot wait to see you live and in person. It's gonna be an amazing event, my 1st 1 ever. And I honestly just cannot wait to see your prizes results. I want you to grow your business. I want you to have clients, your dream clients at that. So we will be talking deeper about those things in the workshop. Sign up for the wait list again, and I will see you guys really soon. Okay, So today's review is brought to you by Crystal McCrary. I actually know her personally. She says not another podcast. So peep this. I've known a lower for about seven years now. The person you get in these podcasts is 100% authentic and humble. I always did that. A lorry show brand and a lorry shall the person is bigger than what she thinks she inspires without trying only Yeah, okay, Teach without knowing and is mentoring in these podcast without pay. I personally am constantly inspired by her drive and nonstop work ethic. If you're like me and tired of fake instagram influencers who only do ads and post unrealistic pictures if you're looking for a true influencer, Laura's there girl, truly amazing with humble beginnings and the info she's giving out for free is priceless. Cheers. Uh, thank you so much. This means so much and the fact that, like we know each other in person, has so wild. But seriously, guys, thank you so much for taking the time to give me a review. It really means the world to me. Every time I'm notified, I do a little happy dance and seeing people grow and seeing people being inspired and seeing people do the thing. It really, really motivates me and you guys are my biggest motivators. Thank you for every single D m in every single email, every single text message every single thing you do support me as what keeps me going. So if you'd like to leave a review to be read on the next podcast, feel free to give me five stars and let me know what you think and let's get out of the episode. Guys, I'm sorry. We've been rambling for the past couple minutes. Okay, so this episode is a good one. I actually kind of miss talking about the angiogram, but I don't talk about it too much. A lot of people kind of have their own stipulations and like instincts about them. But in general, I think it's kind of important that we have some sort of self help tool that we kind of analyze ourselves with and try to butter ourselves instead of just being like hope. This is how I am. Deal with it. So I will be talking in this episode about the any Graham. When I stumbled across a couple years ago and kind of in depth about the different nine types, So enjoy today we're going to talk about that Any a gram. I get constant diems on my instagram about what is my type. How do I know, where do we take the test? What does a wing mean? What does it mean if I change numbers when I'm stressed or I can't relate to this number. But I think I'm this number. We're gonna talk about all of it. This episode has been such a long time coming, and I recently Well, I guess it's not really recently. But I did Ah podcast episode about the any Graham when I first really discovered it, Um, and I didn't have a whole lot of insight to bring, but I have done extensive and obsessive research. Since then, there have been instagram accounts that I've went from, like, 0 to 200 Kato 100 k just because I feel like it's blown up. Um, and I'll explain why in a second. But first of all, I know the biggest question that we all get is where did the any grim come from, and why in the world is it right? It's almost creepy, right? And I do want to say disclaimer. I guess I just want to say I don't think that it's law, you know, it's not something that like, Oh, you're absolutely gonna do this and it's gonna be done this way, like I think of it more as like of self, a self help guiding tool. And it's also a way for us to I use it for good. I use it to understand, to be empathetic, to be sympathetic to other people's needs, Um, and and when you're more aware of something, you're just so much better with your friends, your family, your spouse. I just think that, um, being three, which I will talk about later to that we're always looking to self improve. But seriously, it's not just me. I think we all need to take a look and just analyze your your faults, your fears, your failures, your stresses. Try to avoid them, try toe, heal them and and try to release whatever is negative. That attacking you. I feel like now that I know my issues, I can either be prepared for something. I can analyze things more medical or you're just overreacting because when you get stressed out, you question things, and then I could just, like, shut my brain off. I think Ah, lot of people can agree with me when they say that when you've done extensive research with the anagram. It has actually helped you, um, as a person, for it's just a growth tool. I don't know if I already said that, but I have this book and it's called, um, the anagram made easy. I got it on Amazon. It was like 11 97 best purchase I've ever made. Um, of course, the sacred any Graham is just a major favorite, but that's where people who want to get really deep into it. But if you just kind of wanting to know when you're curious and you want something cute and fun, um, the anagram made easy, has cute little comics, and it breaks things down, kind of like in bullet points, which is what freeze like. We don't like things super extensive, but the sacred Enea Graham and I will include these All in the show notes is more of like a deeper, passionate view on each number. What types they're in, what sections there in, even to the point of like what your virtue is and even howto like help your spiritual sense of off self and what your biggest struggles are and how to deal with them, and it goes really, really deep into the pain because that's really what these are all based on is either it's a childhood wound or it's just a pain that you were not able to process as a child. And most studies say that you know, you are your entire personality by the age of four or five. So something happened to you at a certain age that led you to this point in your life. So I have the anagram made easy in front of me, and I'm just gonna read a little bit about the origin. Because I'm not. I'm not super into it as much as I am just about the tool itself. But I know some people are very skeptical about something that could pretty much tell them everything about themselves and be creepy and right. So, um, the first thing that I would say is the anagrams, a study of the nine basic types of people. It explains why we behave the way we do, and it points to specific directions for individual growth as an important tool for improving relationships with family, friends and co workers. The roots of the angiogram go back many centuries, its exact origin is not known, but it is believed to have been taught orally in secret brotherhoods in the Middle East. The Russian Miskell teacher G I. Gergiev if introduced it to the Europe in the 19 twenties, and then it arrived in the U. S. In the 19 sixties. The anagram system is represented by a circle containing a nine pointed star like shape. Enea is Greek for the number nine, and Graham means drawing so in any Graham just basically means a drawing with nine points. The anagram teaches that early in life we learn to feel safe and to cope with our family situations and personal circumstances by developing a strategy based on our natural talents and abilities. The nine numbers are as follows. I'm just gonna follow the circle one. The perfectionist to the helper three. The achiever for the romantic five. The Observer six. The Questioner seven. The Adventurer eight Theus Oerter and nine The Peacemaker So moving around the anagram the drawing is the nine points on the circumference of the circle are divided into a triangle and a six pointed shape. Each point on the anagram connects to two other points. Thes two points are called your arrows. One relaxed. You take on the positive qualities of the number that connects to yours. When under stress, you reverse directions. One takes on the negative qualities of the 44 of the two and so on. Okay, so about the wings, your personality may blend into or be influenced by the types on either side of yours. So when people say that they have, like a 91 noxious accurate when they say to have a 93 wing or I have like a 47 wing, that's impossible. So the on Lee wing number that you can have is on either side of your number. So for me, for example, I could only be a three wing to or through ing for so brief description of the nine types. Ones are perfectionists are realistic, conscientious and principled. They strive to live up to their high ideals. Two's our helpers there warm concern, nurturing and sensitive to other people's needs. Three. The achievers are energetic, optimistic, self assured and goal oriented. Four romantics have senses of feelings in our warm and perceptive five. Observers have a need for knowledge and our introverted, curious, analytical and insightful. Six questioners are responsible, trustworthy and value loyalty to family, friends, groups and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved and timid, too outspoken and confrontational. Adventures are energetic, lively and optimistic. They want to contribute to the world and ate. A Searchers are direct, self reliance, self confident and protective. Nine peacemakers are receptive, good natured and supportive. They seek union with others and the world around them. So the three centers and this is something that I will probably mention in my interviews of each type and we will naturally say, Although I'm in the heart center or the head center for the gut center, so the three centers are based on a couple things, so the heart or feeling center is focuses on image. The twos, the threes and the force. The head or the thinking center is actually based off of fear. And that is the fives, the sixes and the seventh. The gut or instinctive center is based around anger, which is the eighth, the ninth and the ones. Okay, guys, we got through all of that. So now we're gonna talk a little bit. I'm just gonna give, like, a brief overview of each type. The number there roll their basic fear, basic desire, their virtue, one stress and when at their best. Because, like I said, there, there are numbers that we go to when we are at our best. And then there are numbers that we go to when we are completely stressed out. The one they are the reformer or the perfectionist on their basic fear is being bad and balanced or corrupt. Their basic desire is goodness, integrity and balance. Their virtue is serenity. When they're stressed, they take on the negative aspects of the four and then their bust that take on the positive aspects of the seven. So the two is the helper and the giver. Their basic fear is being unloved, and their basic desire is to feel love. Their virtue is humility at their worst, when they're stressed out to take on the eight negative aspects and then at their best, they take on the four aspects and for three, the achiever and the performer. Our basic fear is worthlessness. The basic desire is to feel valuable. Virtue is authenticity. When stress takes on the aspects of a nine and then at the best like a 64 individualist or romantic. Their basic fears having no identity or significance. Basic desire is to be uniquely themselves. Virtue is emotional balance when stressed acts like a two when secure X like a one. The five is the investigator. The Observer. Basic fear is helplessness and capability and competence. Basic desire is mastery and understanding. Virtue is non attachment. Um, Swin stressed. Acts more like a seven and then, when secure, can also have the positive aspects of eight. Six. Is the loyalist the loyal skeptic? Basic fear is being without support or guidance. Basic desire is to have support and guidance. Virtue is courage when stress they take on the negative aspects of a three and then when secure. The take on the aspects of a 97 is enthusiast. Basic fear is being trapped and pain and deprivation. Basic desire is to be satisfied and content. Virtue is sobriety. When stress, they take on one aspects and when at their best they take on five aspects. A is the challenge of the protector. Basic fears being harmed, controlled or violated. Basic desire is self protection. Virtue is innocents. One stress to take on aspects of the five. And when security take on aspects of the two in the nine Peacemaker mediator, basic fear is lost. Fragmentation, separation. Basic desire is wholeness and peace of mind. Virtue is action, and one stress they take on six and then when they're secure, take on aspects of the three. Okay, guys, if you made it this far, some snaps for yourself, because that was a lot to take in. If you need to rewind because I talk super fast, then feel free to. That's why this is a podcast. Guys, pre recordings. That's the way to go. So now it's mine. Turn, talk about me. If you guys know if you follow me on Instagram, I pretty much post about the anagram at least once or twice a day. I mean, what is the date without posting about it? So I'm gonna talk about myself, are a couple of things that makes a three a three, but I will get into that in a minute. I was just first talk about a couple things just toe, really get more of ah, deeper understanding of us. Um, so basically, at our best, we're optimistic, self affirming, efficient, energetic goal orienting team builder motivator and that our worst, we are deceptive, self promoting, pretentious, vain, superficial, workaholic, overly competitive, etcetera, etcetera threes or people who measure themselves by external achievement and the role that they play three's air. Competent, adaptable, goal oriented, ambitious, organized, charming and very conscious of their image. The wounding childhood message was, It's not okay to have your own feelings and identity. The message that their heart longs to hear is you are loved for yourself without needing to perform. Three's want to feel valuable and worthwhile to be affirmed, to distinguish themselves, to gain the attention and to be admired and to impress others. So there are two wings, obviously one on each side, that a three can have the type through. The two wing is called the three wing to the star. They're warmer, more encouraging, sociable and popular. Type three with the four wing is called the Professional. They're more focused on work, success, introspection. They're more sensitive, artistic, imaginative and pretentious. When we're under stress that we will start to have some of the unhealthy toe average characteristics of a nine, which is like becoming disengaged, apathetic and just on autopilot, losing focus and drive. We involve ourselves in busywork to give us the appearance of accomplishment. Um, feeling little energy and compassion. We want to be left alone and given our space. When we're moving in the direction of growth, we will exhibit some of the healthy characteristics of a type six which is becoming more cooperative and committed to others, becoming aware of our feelings and revealing who we really are behind the achieving mask. And we become more vulnerable because three, they're actually very private people. Okay, so now I'm gonna talk about my personal life and why I feel like I am a three. Um, I think I mentioned this in my previous podcast episode when I discovered the any Graham. But I feel like I am a three because, um, at a very young age, I was exposed to a lot of things in the spotlight. I was, of course, the first granddaughter. The first child I feel like most first Children are usually type threes because there's just so much pressure on us, and we're also the baby that gets tested on for numerous crazy things that parents don't know what they're doing, But I feel like I'm a three because I was involved in a lot of things. I was always I always had solos. I just remember singing a lot when I was little. I think of like the age of three and four. Um, I remember always being the lead and some type of drama. I didn't really have an option or a choice either. So I just remember always being in the spotlight. And I just remember applause really made me feel I I don't really know. I guess I want to say love like it made me feel like appreciated, which is something weird for four year old to remember. But I do remember that, um, I also went to a private school for a couple years before my parents started moving while we move schools about every year. Um, and I would get countless trophies for being the fastest person who did paces and for getting a straight A's, and I just remember having all of those trophies displayed, like on a shelf. My parents hung him up for me. I think that was like three or four of them, and I just remember thinking, I want to get a 1,000,000 of those crazy goals of a full four year old. I always remember wanting to be an actress so bad, and I used to test it on my parents a lot. I was pretty sure that I would be a famous actress when I grew up. Um, I was able to fake sleep like every time, like, you know how Like when you're a kid, you play around and you fall asleep and random parts of the house and your parents bring you up into your room. Well, I wouldn't. I was really good at faking sleep, like I even studied acting to the point where I could tell a kid wasn't really asleep because their eyes would blink when they were closed. So I taught myself how to keep my eyes like, study toe like fake being sleep. And it worked every time such a random memory to remember, but that that's the memory that I have. Um, but yeah, so I just feel like other child. That's just what I've wanted. Um, I also wanted to be a singer when I realized I'm not too bad, and so I had a couple of people that I really wanted to aspire to. Um, I remember I had the preacher's wife soundtrack, and I would practice Whitney Houston almost daily. Honestly, I don't know who can do the runs like she can like. They're probably on the voice that they can, but I can I could do a little, little something. Um, yeah. Some statements that I don't like about being a three is, um, I think a lot of people take us as being attention hungry, and I don't think that's really what it is. Ah, lot of people think that we're vain because we have. We're really good at dressing ourselves. Most three is know how to dress. I can spot a three mile away. They've narrowed down like fashion to a T. Um, it's And the thing is, I think a lot of people don't like that. Freeze appears so effortless. People don't like you being too much better than them. They want you to be the average or less than That's just a natural thing that I'm coming to know as I'm getting older and life is, as Ken has told me before, like nobody wants the person around the block to be doing so much better than them. But maybe someone on TV, Yeah, you can accept that, but not somebody you know. So, um, I think that's another reason why we are very private people. Um, it's kind of weird because, you know, we are pretty much actors and actresses like threes are. I can't even explain it another way like we can. We have the ability to kind of feel what people need, or we also know what sells to other people, like we're really good salesman. Um, it's just It's such a like a gift I get. I want to say it's a gift. I don't want to say it's a curse. It is gift. We can definitely even we can shape, shift. We can become like somebody else. We can literally take on an entire personality of somebody else just to get them to like us, like Oh my gosh, if they like me, I'll be I'll be funny because I don't make them like me or stuff like that. It's really crazy, and it's really weird saying this out loud because I don't like being super out there like and and we're very intentional about the types of things that we want to be public, like on our terms. But nobody knows the super super deep fights that me and can I've ever had, like nobody knows. Nobody knows, Um, like mental problems or mental things that I battled with, like there are so many things people do not know about me and they will say, Like some people have told me like, I just feel like I know you But I don't know you and it's kind of true. Like I don't necessarily just talk about myself. I would rather ask how other people are doing Then talk about myself like talking about myself is probably like one of the worst, and it just seems so narcissistic. My mind has made me believe that talking about yourself is narcissistic when really, it's just being human. But it's kind of hard to like reverse psychologically change that, um, some signals that I do like is that people? Well, what I'm finding out is that people do like us and they're inspired by us, and I think that's awesome. I had no idea. At first I really thought that everyone did hate me as much as people have told me growing up yet it's kind of weird to talk about it, but it's true like and you can always feel. And I don't even like saying this work because the word is just such. I just I don't like it's icky, but jealousy, you know, And I could feel I can feel things off of people, which is probably what my two wing is so strong. Um, but, you know, I can tell when people just being around me just to make themselves look good or and I'm not saying that from a narcissistic point of view, But I'm just saying, like some people just hang around me just because it's like trending, Does that make any sense? I don't know. This is so weird. I wish I had someone like in a conversation with me about this girl. It's just nuts. But a couple of things that I do dislike about being a three. I do dislike that. Sometimes I just feel like I can't just not have a good day. Um, like, I don't know. I just feel like I have to always be super inspiring and super positive all the time. And don't get me wrong I'm a naturally optimistic person. If there is an issue and you say there's a hole in the roof will I will find a piece of paper to cover it up, like I am instantly trying to figure out a way to fix things. And it's kind of hard for me even to accept when things aren't OK. Um, I really don't like that. I'm not in touch with my feelings. I really, really, really, really wish that there was a way that I could figure that out. But I can't. I've tried for years three's air, very disconnected. Like even though we're in the heart center, we're so disconnected from our heart. I don't understand how I'm feeling until I'm upset when I'm angry and I'll just, like, start saying things. And I'm like, I had no idea I felt that way, like my husband will the event can. Ken will sometimes just be like, um, are you okay? And I'm like, I am fine. I have never been so fine in my entire life. He's like, I just feel like you're not fine is like I am so fine and then, like later that night, I'm freaking out about something so stupid, like dropping a grocery bag. And he's just, like, told you you weren't fine. And it's so funny because, like, fives are actually for them not appearing emotional. They're actually like internally emotional, which means they can pick up on people's feelings. They can even pick up when people are lying like they can always read between the lines, which I am so gullible. I believe everything you say. So, yeah, people would love to have a three around were just like Oh my gosh, you're great because you told us you were great. Or maybe that's just me. That might just be me. It might not even be a free thing. What do I love about being a three? I love a sense of community. I feel like that we bring. I have the ability to be friends with anybody I can I can pretty much see from everyone side of this story. I feel like as a three, I can move around the circle and just find something. If even if it's like a really small thing that we have in common, I do like that. I can relate to a lot of people in that way. And I like how understanding I feel like threes are just because their their ability to be around different types of people. Um, I think that's cool, too. I also love our big like advocacy for authenticity, like we really, really were drawn to people that a riel, Well, maybe just I am. But I feel like three's really love people that just say how it is and they live it. And it's just inspiring. Tow us, like being really they're just there's nothing else like it. And so about a year ago before I stumbled on the angiogram and I was already on my way out, I stopped carrying what people really thought of me. In a sense, I think that three's will kind of always really wonder what people think about them. And maybe that rail like relates to a lot of other types, too. But I stopped like being super trendy. I stopped caring about high labels just for the label. I don't know if anybody can relate, but like, you know, just trying to find, um, I'm Michael Corps or this kind of bag or this kind of choose. I just got I stopped caring about the the huge name brands and not to mention the fact that Ah, lot of name brands like the big ones are the worst quality. Like if it's not a real leather bag, why in the world do I need it just because there's a little stamp of gold that says the name? I'm just paying for that stamp of gold because obviously the material could It came from China for crying out loud, and I just I came to this like a revelation, like, I'm not gonna wear name brands anymore, brainless like I don't know if it's trending. I don't care if it's trending, but I'm not spending hundreds of dollars on, like these huge name brands to flaunt them, which is actually free marketing. Just okay on the stop ranting, Um, as like, you know what? I'm just gonna wear basics. I started looking up minimalism, and my husband was like, I've been a minimalist all along. Finally, you joined the train because I was just so obsessed with name brand. I mean, so obsessed. I would be in Clarence aisles like digging around for like, the latest whatever bag, just so that I could show it off. And like, why? What was the point? So after I had Ella, I just was like, You know what? I don't really care that much. How much this cost. Um, and even if it was costly, if is it good quality quality over quantity? I was doing a spring splurge, and I got rid of so many just pointless clothes just to show off. It was show offy close. Now, don't get me wrong for anniversary. Like we're probably gonna do something, you know, But, I mean, just tow, have expensive clothes for a one time. Where was just so useless to me. So I made it a point to myself ago, Laura, by quality over quantity, do not buy it because of the brand by it. Because it was made of 100% cotton and not polyester and ray on materials. Melora, if you're gonna get a bag, make sure it is your only back, or you only have two bags, maybe a black leather bag and a brown leather bag. I just And once I change my mind set, everything else just started changing for me. I stopped caring about keeping up with the latest fashions I stopped caring about. If I looked appealing to other people like three's. I feel like when we buy something we always like. Okay, what are people going to say when I wear this outfit? It just sounds like an actress, right? Like, oh, well, the crowd go wild when I wear this amazing outfit, huh? Feels crazy to say, but no, like, nobody cares. I mean, maybe they will compliment you, but if they don't, then you should be confident in your own skin and not looking for the approval of other people. And so I just I started journaling, and I just started talking about how I wanted to look. I started going on Pinterest and getting ideas for styles that I like just because I liked it just because I like the color, the material, the texture. And then I started doing that from my house. I necessarily don't buy huge name brand or go to big department stores to buy my furniture. What? So I can say I got it at Sears Full price, Like who cares? Who really cares? Um, I'm sorry. So that was the realization that I had I think went like the further down you get an age like when I was a teenager. Man. Oh, man, I do not miss those days because I had no sense of security. Um, Social media was sort of coming out then and it was just so intimidating, like being almost 30. I feel like I just don't care. I'm doing it for me right now. I'm doing life for me. I'm wearing stuff for me. I'm being a mom for me. I'm not looking for the validation in other people. And I mean, I've mentioned that on my instagram like followers over fame, podcast is just like who cares? And if you're not making money and if you like, if when you buy expensive stuff you didn't have the money for it like that just doesn't prove anything, it just shows people. It shows people that you want them to think you have money when you're really struggling because you're trying to keep up. And honestly, you're hurting yourself. You're not hurting Amy bite but yourself and your image is just tainted. It's not natural. It's not authentic. It's not riel. Um, and if I do, do you have the money to get something. I'm not gonna buy it. I just don't think it serves a purpose. A lot of people disagree with me on this topic, but this is I'm talking about myself. You know, some people like, Well, I like buying name brand, even if it's bad quality, and that's totally fine. But I'm just talking about me. Um, how has being a three Help me and my business or with others? So I feel like being a three. Like I mentioned before that were really good with people. And I'm also really good with my clients and getting a vibe of how they feel I can automatically detect, you know, beforehand. Like what they need from me. So that's definitely helped me a lot. Um, I'm able to be very understanding good quality. Customer service is a big deal to me, and that's also help me with my clients as well, because that is a major thing of being itself employed business owner. How has it hindered me? My business in life? Um, being a business owner, which is what A three wood. It's like a dream for us. It is to be the boss of our own business but workaholic ism. That is my hugest hindrance. Um, and I says, like even in the anagram made, easy book that, you know, we work so much even as parents like when we're parenting, we want we're tourney between hanging out with our Children and working. It's like we're gold minded people and add That is one thing that hinders me in my life. I can't ever I can't always go with the flow. I at least have to have, like, a begin game in the end game kind of set up. I have to have goals that need to be accomplished, whether it's I went to Target and I only stayed there for two hours instead of three hours like everything is kind of business. See, like we're just made to be machines. Um, what is some advice that I have for other threes or people setting the any Graham one take the test. Um, don't knock it if you haven't tried it. Um, some other advice is, you know, definitely use it as a sense, like finding your sense of self and dealing with your fears is scary. And it's honestly, when I first found the anagram like I got emotional and I did not know why. Because I just felt like somebody just read my journal from when I was 17 years old. That I burned years ago, like every single thing that I've ever wanted or wanted to be was like revealed when the anagram came out, and it is scary. Like I said, Freeze are very private people about their personal lives. Um, and so to have that exposed it, like, forced me to have to deal with my desires. My fears and on the stress is everything that comes along with it. But it's something that must be done if you want to improve. If you want to be better. If you want to deal with the thing that you don't want to deal with, this is this is the way I feel like the any. Graham has helped me in so many ways, shapes and forms. I just feel like I don't know, like I mentioned some so many times. It's helped me with people to help me with my friends, my spouse. My marriage is incredible. I mean, working at best just because I can understand Ken's needs and wants for me. I know what stresses him out. I know how he naturally is. And he knows the same about me. And he appreciates the things that he really thought that were just ridiculous. Like me working a lot if he just thinks it is ridiculous because he likes to take a lot of breaks. Um, but I think he understands now that it's not like something I'm doing toe hurt myself. I just It's how I was made. I was made to be a working, hard working person, so I don't know. It just helps you realize the world is not about you, and there are other people that are dealing with things, and we all have a gift. We all have something that we can bring to the table, and we also have things, worry, struggle. But that's how we can help each other and let each other up. I think it's great. I think it's awesome. Well, that's all I have for the re broadcasted episode. Feel free to let me know if you guys like these and since I'm not on Instagram, feel free to email me. That's fun, right? But seriously, thank you so much for listening Feel free to screen shot this year and your stories share it with friends and also keep in touch with me. Because literally, I am only available by email right now. That's so weird. But thank you so much, guys. For tuning in today's episode. I will see you again, sweetie. Bye.